Rape. Not Your Momma's Point Of View.

So here’s an interesting text conversation that took place the other day (and I’m going to only hit the high lights because it was long):

Me: Hey, BTW thanks for spitting your gum in the disposal side of my kitchen sink the other day! That’s not all that good for garbage disposals!

A: WHAT?? I would NEVER spit gum into a sink, let alone a sink that wasn’t mine! I spit it into the trash, I demand an apology right now!

Me: Whatever, you were drunk off your a$$ and you just don’t remember doing it but it was there after you left so it was you.

A: I’m waiting for my apology. . . . . . .

Me: You’re acting like I accused you of raping my dog or something. It was gum. In the sink. I cleaned it out, and it’s fine now.

A: Dog rape is ok.

Me: Dog rape is not ok.

A: Yes it is, if the dog licks you first.

Which brought the discussion of the rape of various species to the forefront and launched my brain into it’s wayward thinking.

OK, I don't dress my chihuahuas up but this is pretty freaking cute

OHMYGOD do NOT hurt Mr. Fluffykins or I will personally kill you!

Quite possibly the coolest train wreck of a next door neighbor anyone could ever wish for, but rape-able?  No.

I'm pretty sure that they even smell like greasy car salesmen.  *SHUDDER* The Baldwin brothers......ugh.

Damn!  Check out how HOT Hans Solo was looking!  He's not only German (Hans) but  all space-y in his knee high boots. . . . . . . . . . . . . 

And for the guys, of course:

The all American girl - before the blow and the fame kicked in.

Good God what I wouldn't give to be in a Riker, Picard & Data sandwich.  It's a good thing I was only 11 years old when I went to that Star Trek convention because they wouldn't have known what hit them otherwise.  They would've woken up in a puddle of lube, dildos and costumes.

And OHHHHH ladies, I didn't forget about you, no, no.  ANDOHMYGODYES.  YUMMY. WITH. A. SPOON.  :

JEEZUSSSS!  It would be a CRIME if he WEREN'T a sex addict!!  I mean  there's already just not enough Mulder to go around!  Am I right or what???

WHEW!  Holy Cow, I need a minute.  Ok, ok, where was I?  Oh yes, which brings me to THIS:

Not my cup of tea but read further. . . . . . .

Aliens.  Seriously, c'mon.  I mean, what, with all the anal probing they've done to us throughout the years (I'm not forgetting about what they did to you, Mulder) right along with mutilating our livestock and making us go nuts over crop circles (that are probably just directions to the nearest Carl's Jr. for the other aliens to follow any damn way,) I think they're due a raping.  

We as humans have had no problem raping other races/creeds/species as time has moved on and I for one think it's about damn time we capture one and rape the $hit out of it.  Then we can treat it to Carl's Jr. for dinner, throw it the deuces and call it even.

That is all.  

**Please send all marriage proposals to ThisOneTimeAtArtCamp@yahoo.com, as I am currently available.